Motherhood Is Not A Handicap

Many mom bloggers wrote great rebuttals to the New York Times story, “Honey, Don’t Bother Mommy. I’m Too Busy Building My Brand.”

There are links to many of them here.

I was going to just leave it alone. The other bloggers said it really well, and I figured there wasn’t much left to say.

But I kept thinking about the article. What was it that bothered me so much?

Was it the condescending line in the opening paragraph that referred to mom bloggers as the “Minivan Set”?

Was is the statement taken out of context about the blogger who received 28,549 page views of her tutu tutorial?

Was it the description of the attendees at Bloggy Bootcamp that made them sound like members of a high school pep squad?

Sure, all that is irritating. But there’s something else. And I couldn’t put my finger on it until yesterday.

There is an underlying tone in the article of disbelief that moms could and would actually take themselves and their interests seriously. That they would be audacious enough to want to learn, and *gasp* maybe even make some money. After all, we’re just a bunch of silly women who do laundry, and wipe noses all day.

Society seems to view motherhood as a handicap. The children who cling to our hands and hang on our legs are the growths that impede us.

Motherhood is or should be so all consuming that we can not learn, can not achieve, can not dream beyond what we’re making for dinner. Once a woman gives birth suddenly she stops growing, losing every aspect of herself, but the one that nurtures children.

On the contrary. The nitty-gritty, self-sacrificing work that motherhood is has stretched me, taught me about myself, my abilities and my desires more than any desk job ever could.

It’s only natural that women who experience motherhood seek out new endeavors, be it grad school, a business start-up or, yes, even blogging.

I am a mom. I am a blogger. I am so much more than that.

New York Times, don’t bother me. I busy living my life.

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18 Responses to Motherhood Is Not A Handicap

  1. Well said. It is true that “normal” society sees motherhood as a handicap. Even a small segment of mothers see their progeny as hindrances. Being a mother is the BEST thing I’ve done with my life. It’s the best CAREER I’ve ever had because I have changed, I’m more self-confident, I have learned how to be more compassionate. Those are skills that more people need to learn, whether it is through the course of motherhood or elsewhere.
    .-= Heather @ Not a DIY Life´s last blog ..Mamavation Week #11 =-.

  2. Eh, I’m not sure the article implied that. As someone unable to have children, I’M the one who feels “handicapped,” whenever I meet someone the first question is “how many kids do you have?” and if I say none the next one is “do you think you’ll have any sometime soon?” And these are business associates!
    .-= Wendy (The Local Cook)´s last blog ..Fitness Friday: On Building Good Habits, and Trying to Be a Food Renegade =-.

  3. Wendy, people can be very insensitive, and rude. I do wonder sometimes if they think before they speak, especially when asking appropriate questions.

    I stopped over at your blog. It’s nice to meet another West Michigan blogger!

  4. What a wonderful post! I haven’t read the article (I will be going there next) but I completely agree with your view of being a mother and being a blogger.

    Stopping in from Friday Follow.

  5. “the nitty-gritty self-sacrificing work that motherhood is has stretched me, taught me about myself, my abilities and my desires more than any desk job ever could”

    WOW! That is right on to how I feel. My life as a mom has changed and increased my thinking, my skills, my wants, and my needs. I NEVER would have obtained those changes at the office. I am so glad that you decided to write about the article that you read on mommy bloggers. I read it quickly and was turned off by it so I closed the page. I think I may have to read it again, your summary made me a lil ticked!

    Thanks again and blessings to you and yours..

  6. Well said. I agree that the article seemed to imply moms are not talented, amazing, capable women with many degrees, career experience and yes a family. If it was to say that moms gathering this way is new in the past 10 years (maybe 3-5 for some) or that blogging is really taking off and women with children are a strong voice and many make income from me- then yes that is true.
    .-= Kristin @ mommie911´s last blog ..Welcome =-.

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