This is what kids out of school for the summer leads to:
“What do you mean you don’t want to watch Looney Tunes?! Looney Tunes are great. They’re classic.
You know what? When I was a kid Looney Tunes were the only cartoons we had. And we were glad to have them. We were grateful!
They weren’t even in high def. In fact, my parents didn’t have a color TV, or cable until I was 8. That’s right. I watched Looney Tunes in black and white, and sometimes they were fuzzy, and if my mom was in the kitchen using the mixer there were lines through the screen. Sometimes the president would interrupt them and talk about hostages.
But I didn’t care, because when I was a kid we didn’t complain about what we had. We were happy just to have TV. There was no such thing as On Demand or NetFlix or a Blue Ray or the Internet. You watched what was on at 3 o’clock even if you didn’t like the After School Special.
Never mind what the After School Special is.
We even enjoyed the commercials.
And if there was something on the other channel you wanted to watch you had to drag your lazy butt up off the couch, walk over to the TV, and turn the knob with your hand. That’s right. The TV didn’t even have buttons. It had knobs. That you had to change manually. We didn’t have a remote control.
You know what? Maybe life was harder back then, but it taught us a lesson. It taught us that if you wanted something you worked for it, and if you couldn’t get it you had to be content with what you had. There weren’t 650 different stations to choose from. ‘Oh, my life is so hard. I can’t decide, Spongebob or Phineas and Ferb. Oh, what should I do?’ Please.
Oh, there weren’t any of these nice flat screens either. TVs were the size of station wagons back then.
What’s a station wagon? What — ugh.
Now you’re telling me Looney Tunes aren’t good enough for you? I don’t want to hear it anymore. You’re going to sit down there, and watch Porky Pig in millions of brilliant high definition colors with surround sound, and you’re going to like it!!!!!!
Then I’ll tell you about how I walked to school. Up hill. Both ways. Through a blizzard. Even in May.”